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Dear baby boy,

Today I visited a blog, written by a mother who had lost her toddler aged daughter. I’ve visited her blog before, but I read her words only when I am strong enough to bear her pain. My throat burned and almost gave way to my suppressed tears as I swallowed her story. My heart breaks for her.

I imagine myself without my baby boy but my thoughts last only moments there. I can’t bear to witness a world without you for more than seconds at a time.

It has been months since I’ve taken the time to compile the things I love about you. Like, the way you pat our backs when you are actually the one in pain. Or the way you sing and dance to the chicken dance. I love the way you play air guitar and bang on the pots and pans with my wooden spoons.

I love how you run as fast as you can to get your big brother’s PSP and play it like a big boy. I love how you adore your big brother. I love how he holds a special spot for you in his heart too. I smile when you hold your hand out for me to tickle and rub before you fall asleep. I love that you play along with my silliness and run to give me hugs when I ask you for “my squeezies”.

I love that you are “too big” to eat with baby spoons or forks. I love that you have not stopped playing with your hair when you are tired, or need to relax. I love your new found independence.

I never want to forget these precious things about you. Thank you for being Momma’s Precious Boy.


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